You know, it’s funny for me to experience writing on this blog. I said from the beginning that I am only doing for my own sake, and if someone can benefit, that’s great, but it is not the goal. I am simply writing these posts to express my thoughts, document my reflections and improve my writing skills for creating content marketing for my startup. However, I keep finding myself writing these posts as if I am writing it to someone. Even the way I started this post is a great example, you know.
I guess it comes down to several things, and I am not quite sure about how much each of the factors weigh. First of all, I think that since I am writing a blog, I know it can be read by other people, and that fact in itself is enough for me to write it as if someone came across it. Another thing is that making a blog that is public can be a rather vulnerable thing to do. I am showing the world who I am by writing these posts as honestly as I try to do, and that can be a bit scary. I think I am generally quite good at being open and honest, but writing it on a blog is taking it to another level. I guess that since my goal is also to become better at creating content for my startup that it makes sense to write it as if it is for someone to read.
It is an interesting learning experience for me because the way I have set it up is in a way that shouldn’t put any pressure on my writing, and yet I notice that I struggle with sitting down to write this post every day. Part of it, for sure, is that I used to be very perfectionist, and I am actively working towards being less so. Nonetheless, I am not quite there yet, and so I cringe every time I have to put something like even this post out there. I do know that it is part of the practice, though, so I force myself to do it. Also, I have noticed and am noticing right now that when I actually do sit down and get started writing, I write a ton, and I enjoy the process of putting my thoughts into words on the screen. I write a journal every day (something I should make another post about), and I find that journaling by handwriting is a very slow form of expression, and my mind works a LOT faster than my handwriting, which means that my reflection will be interrupted because my writing needs to follow along. When I write on this blog, I find that I am able to write much faster, which creates a cool flow in my reflection. I don’t think that this type of reflection is necessarily better because I think my reflections in my journals are quite profound, but I definitely get a different type of value out of this blog.
I can also feel that I am slowly starting to adopt an identity as a writer. It is something that I have resisted for a long time because I associated writing with old, boring homework (I think it goes all the way back to my experiences in elementary school). Now that I am doing it for my own sake, out of my own free will, gosh, I find that I am enjoying it much more, and I notice a lot of value in it, and actually I think that my writing is getting better as well. I notice patterns in my writing, I get better at expressing myself, and I correct what I notice that is bad about it. I am definitely not a great writer yet, but I can definitely see improvement, and I find it exciting to figure out my own style of writing.